Wednesday, 16 August 2017

Mental Health, Mindfulness, Happiness, Anxiety, Low Mood, mhbloggers, Nicki Kinickie, Headcaseblog,

Last week I posted about how my mood had darkened lately, something I never thought I would do, firstly because I lose motivation for everything when I feel that way including writing but also because it feels too personal. Too raw. It is a very vulnerable thing to do; put yourself on the internet and talk about how you are feeling when you are feeling really low.

Anyway, I did it and I am proud because that is what this blog is about: MENTAL HEALTH and that includes mine. It's all well and good writing posts on here when I am feeling fine and dandy but it is much more real if I post when things aren't that great. It is also a huge milestone for me to be able to do that because I really struggle with writing when feeling crap.

Anyway, How have I been feeling? Well my mood hasn't really changed if I am honest however I can slowly feel it lifting because I continue to wake up each day determined to power through. It isn't easy but I know that eventually powering through will conquer the low mood and I will start to feel better again.

I have kept myself busy and made sure I get up in the morning as soon as I'm awake rather than laying there. The tasks I have set myself for the day have been simple but I have praised myself for completing each one of them and if anything doesn't get done I don't beat myself up because I know day to day tasks are bit more difficult at this time.

Another thing I have done is be a bit more selfish and take time out for myself. My main treat has been having a nice long hot bubble bath and last night I painted my nails. It is little things like that that can really boost your mood. Having my husband around this last couple of weeks before he starts his new job has helped too as it has been nice to have time together as a family.

The main thing I have been aware of is getting stressed. You tend to be more short tempered when feeling really low or going through bad bouts of anxiety so need to be more aware of that. It is so easy for your partner, the neighbour or your little one to try your patience a bit more than usual so I find the best thing to do is acknowledge it, breathe and count to ten before reacting. Easily said on this post I know, when you have all of these emotions running through you that you can't control it can feel overwhelming.

Anyway, that is kind of it for now. My mood isn't any better or worse than since my last post, actually that's wrong it is a bit better definitely.

Right now it is just about taking each day at a time and being aware of how I feel. It is also about doing what I need to do to make myself feel better. If the washing and housework gets done and I also write, play with Savannah or take her out then that's great. If less(a lot less) gets done the next day then that's fine too. Sometimes it is good to take time out.

Having hubby around has been great too. I have been honest about I feel and he has really helped out around the house (in fact he deep cleaned all of downstairs while I was at work the other day) so that has made me feel a lot better. Tidy house (for me) equals tidy mind. When I am not in the best place mentally my house tends to reflect that!

I dunno if deep down something is contributing to my mood and I just don't realise it. Without whining (cos I hate whining especially when things are really not as bad as they are for others) money has been tight, hubby's work situation has been unstable and life has been busy. We rehomed our beloved house bunny this week too which was really upsetting. I had been stressing about her for weeks though and feeling guilty every time I took Savannah out for the day so I am hoping once the grief of saying goodbye disbands my mood will lift because that guilt and worry about her welfare will be gone.

We shall see.

Life is hard sometimes. End Of.


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